Meaning in Misery
by HogwartsPrincess11587
Summary: Draco finds meaning and motivation following a funeral. I've always wondered why Draco became a healer, this is my theory. One-Shot.


_Hello! As always just borrowing JKR's wonderful creations. I haven't published anything in ages so I figured I'd start by publishing a story I've had sitting around for a while. I have often wondered what would inspire Draco to become a healer, this is one possibility, not a very nice one either. I apologise in advance, this was tough to write and it's probably tougher to read._

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><p>It was awful, standing at the entrance to the church waiting for the coffin to arrive. When it did they didn't even look up, or speak as they helped the man get it out of the hearse. It was so small and white and they could both picture the fragile body it contained. His small bald head - how he had hated losing his hair. They both took a deep breath as they entered the church, the coffin easily held between them. Once they had set the coffin down, they separated still not looking at each other. As the priest talked Harry zoned out thinking about how many times Teddy had asked 'Where do people go when they're dead?'. Harry had never really thought about death, despite the fact he had faced it many time he always knew deep down he was going to live. Harry wasn't religious, he had faced too much to consider the possibility of a God. He had thought though that the funeral of a child should take place in a church. Draco had agreed. Harry felt that the blonde would have agreed to anything in that moment. He had stood there in the hospital room looking down at the empty bed with a look that physically hurt Harry. Harry thought back to Teddy and once again felt tears leave his eyes. This was wrong. Children weren't meant to die. Finally getting up the courage Harry listened to the words of the priest "It is never easy to farewell a child but it must be remembered that he is in a better place now, with his mother and father who both valiantly fought for his freedom. Their reunion is something to celebrate, not mourn" The old man had said looking with a faint smile down to the tiny white coffin. Harry couldn't breathe for a moment and he was forced to reach for the tissue in his pocket. Standing before his mirror that morning he had promised himself he wouldn't use it. He wiped his eyes and tried to blow his nose quietly. It wasn't very effective but he didn't want to disturb the others. There were terribly few people there. Harry felt awful that in his four years of life Teddy had been so sheltered and restricted. The people in attendance were all friends and family members, in total they numbered just over twenty.<p>

The priest finished and Harry and Draco moved simultaneously to carry the coffin to the grave site. They exchanged a quick glance, neither wanted to look at the other for fear of the pain once again forcing tears from their eyes. This time placing the coffin down took longer as they both silently said their final goodbyes. The little boy that had brought light to their lives was gone, forever. Harry felt a moment of guilt, he stumbled, his legs almost failing him. Hermione had somehow expected it and she moved to help him. If Remus and Tonks hadn't died would Teddy have even gotten sick? The doctors had never been able to tell him how Teddy had gotten cancer and he secretly blamed himself. Harry stood back and watched as the coffin was lowered and each person threw a rose in after it. He liked the variation in the colour of roses people had chosen. In his mind they symbolized the ever changing moods Teddy possessed, some colours even matched those his hair had favored. The priest said some final words and Draco was first to throw a shovelful of earth into the deep hole. Harry did the next before Hermione cast a spell to finish the job. Bright green grass and colourful wildflowers sprouted from the mound of soil as they watched. Harry cleared his throat before saying "Thank you for attending, you are all invited to the wake which will be held at Malfoy Manor, beginning in three quarters of an hour." The crowd began to dissipate until only Harry and Draco were left standing at the mound. Harry made a mental note to thank Hermione later. "I feel like we should have done more" Draco said finally acknowledging Harry's presence. It took Harry a moment to banish the lump in his throat before he replied "We did the right thing, more Chemo wouldn't have saved him". Draco nodded before letting tears run down his face, he sunk to his knees as he began to cry softly. Harry moved to his side and placed a hand on his shoulder feeling that any more contact would cross the line they had drawn. They were acquaintances, united solely by Teddy. "It feels so wrong, that he was killed by a stupid muggle disease" Draco said pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket to wipe his eyes and blow his nose. Harry knelt down keeping his hand on Draco's shoulder. "I know, but nothing we can do will bring him back" Harry said trying to keep things in perspective. Hundreds of incredible people had died to protect him over the years. "We'd better go" Draco said standing up stiffly, Harry's hand fell to his side and they apparated separately without another word.

Hermione gave Harry a hug and pulled him into the dining room before she handed him a tray of food. "Keep busy?" she asked. With a nod he took the tray and started making his way around the room offering the pastries to people as he went. When the tray was finally empty he discarded it on a side table. He fled the dining room in search of a quiet place to sit and think. He found a day bed in an otherwise unfurnished room and made himself comfortable. It didn't take long for him to drift to sleep, after all he had spent the last couple of weeks sleeping in uncomfortable hospital chairs. Draco found the sleeping Harry a few hours later, he owled Hermione to let her know Harry was safe before finding a blanket. He carefully put the blanket on Harry before making his way to his own room, not that he was going to be able to sleep. Draco loathed those few seconds just after waking up, when everything could still be a bad dream, before reality crushed him again, realization more painful each time. How could life go on, he had nothing to live for now that Teddy was gone. After the battle of Hogwarts Draco had stood alongside his family on trial. Harry had spoken for him and saved him the lengthy prison stay dealt to his mother and father. Suddenly left in the world without direction he had been taken in by his aunt Andromeda, tiny Teddy Lupin's guardian. He had learned quickly that helping out was expected, especially when it came to taking care of Teddy. Now laying in the bedroom he had slept in since birth he reflected on the moment when the great Harry Potter had walked in on him struggling to quiet the screaming baby. Aunt Andromeda had gone out to visit a sickly friend, leaving Draco to care for Teddy when Harry Potter, the boy wonder, decided to pay his godson a visit. Draco had been standing in the kitchen rocking Teddy back and forth, baby vomit spreading slowly down his back, unable to hear the doorbell over Teddy's wailing. Harry had invited himself in and quickly snatched the baby from the ex-deatheater, certain the blond had been hurting the now scarlet haired infant. After a heated discussion and brief explanation they had come to an agreement, they were only spending time together, being nice to each other, for Teddy. This arrangement didn't change until Andromeda fell ill, when they agreed to move in together, for Teddy's sake of course. Soon after that Andromeda had died, leaving two sworn enemies to care for a troublesome three year old. They had managed well, even becoming friends. Then came the diagnosis, six months of chemotherapy, various attempts at magical healing followed by a slow and painful demise, not just for Teddy but for Draco and Harry as well. Both convinced that they were somehow responsible for Teddy's illness. Three days earlier Draco had received an urgent message from Harry, he forgot the shower he had come home to take and rushed back to the hospital. By the time he arrived Teddy was gone, forever. Once again he was left struggling to comprehend what on earth life had in store for him next. He wasn't sure he could endure more of this but he would, for Teddy. He'd search the world, hone his skills, study and practice until he found a cure for cancer.

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><p><em>Sorry again...I'd love to hear your thoughts so if you liked it or even hated it let me know in a review :D <em>

_Thanks for Reading!_


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